


The Rest of Your Life

by orphan_account



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Episode: s02e03 School Reunion, F/M, Just to warn you, Quite a lot, Written to cure writers block tbh, a terrible joke at the end, assumes GitF doesn't happen after this, because screw that, references I Should Tell You from Rent, slight angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2017-09-13
Packaged: 2018-12-29 08:04:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,338
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12079251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Rose is upset after the conversation outside the chippy, but when Sarah Jane brings them back to her flat, she confronts him about what he almost said, causing him to reveal a lot more than he intended to.





	The Rest of Your Life

After they left the chippy, Sarah Jane dropped Rose and the Doctor off at the Tyler’s flat, giving him another longing look that sent a ping of jealousy through his present companion. His reunion with the older woman had caused a tension between the two of them, neither had spoken a word on the way over. They hadn’t said anything since he’d almost unintentionally let the one thing he was never supposed to tell her slip. 

 

The Doctor was being particularly quiet, but every so often when they’d stop at a traffic light, he would look over at Rose, at the empty hand she kept held out beside her as she stared out the window. A solemn look appeared on his features as he remembered what had caused it. All he wanted to do in that moment was finish his sentence, explain to her how he felt in all the languages he knew how to speak- and that was a lot of languages.

 

But he couldn’t. He had to put those walls up and stop himself from saying everything he wanted so desperately to say for fear of what would happen when he inevitably lost her one day. The pain of that future loss already hung over him like a cloud everyday. If he started something with her romantically, it’d only tear his hearts in four.

 

Internally, he let his walls come back up, and thanked Sarah Jane for the ride back to the Powell Estate before he and Rose hopped out of her car, and watched her drive away before they turned to go back into the flat. 

 

Rose looked up at him curiously, “Why didn’t you go with her?” she asked, pointing at the car as it drove further and further out of sight. 

 

The time lord raised a confused eyebrow, “What do you mean?”

 

“She could’ve driven you back to the Tardis,” his companion pointed out as they walked back to her flat, “You could’ve gone back, we could’ve gone back.”

 

The Doctor shrugged, “Nah, the Krillitanes’ll have it surrounded. Best not. Your mum won’t mind, will she?”

 

Rose shook her head as they climbed the stairs to her floor, “She phoned me this morning, said she won’t be at the flat tonight. She’s at Mo’s,” she told him. 

 

“Ah,” he replied, sensing there was still a significant amount of tension in her tone, and judging by the fact that she barely even looked at him, she was still angry? Jealous? What exactly was emanating from his companion just then? He couldn’t tell, he had no earthly idea what was wrong, and he didn’t bother to ask until they were through the Tyler’s flat door.

 

When Rose closed the door behind them and walked into the family room ahead of him, he leaned against the wall, “Is something wrong?” he asked worriedly. 

 

“Wrong? What do you mean, wrong?” she stared at him in concern, but not in disbelief. There was an air of anticipation about the look she was giving him when she finally did turn to look at him, and it was as if she’d been expecting him to ask- no, not expecting,  _ waiting. _

 

“Rose, you’ve been silent since we left the chippy,” he reminded her, stepping toward her as he only just resisted the urge to hold her hand, “Given what’s just happened… I can’t help but think…”

 

“No, it’s fine,” she told him, though the statement was almost certainly a lie, “I’m just tired is all, and I wanted to get to bed,” she pointed to her bedroom, “Guess you could have the sofa. My mum would slap you so hard you’d regenerate if she found out we slept in the same bed.”

 

“Wouldn’t be the first time,” he joked with a hint of a smile, which was dimly received by his companion as she stepped back towards her bedroom door. 

 

She sighed as she rested her hand on the door knob, “Night, Doctor,” she said, beginning to push the door open. 

 

He gave her a curt nod, understanding that their conversation as well as their evening together was coming to a close. He tried not to let it bother him as he sat down on the family room sofa, and said, “Night, Rose,” before turning around to face the opposite wall. 

 

All he heard after that was silence. He’d been anticipating the opening and closing of Rose’s door, her footsteps as she entered the room, the thudding of her shoes on the ground as she kicked them off of her feet, but he heard nothing. Not until Rose spoke up a moment later, her voice softer than he’d ever heard it as she uttered out a mere two words, “But… Doctor?”

 

He turned around, standing up as he answered her question with a, “Yeah?”

 

She looked almost nervous as she stood in front of the partially opened doorway, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear before she spoke again, “The hell did you mean back there?” she asked, her eyes meeting his, “You said I could spend the rest of my life with you, but you can’t spend yours with me.”

 

He paused, hesitating as his eyes flickered between hers, and for once, he found himself unsure of what to say. The conversation had barely begun, but he could feel her clawing at those newly repaired walls he’d put up to prevent himself from revealing exactly what they both knew he wanted to reveal, “Nothing,” he told her, the lie more evident in his voice than it had ever been in hers, “I don’t- I didn’t-”

 

Rose crossed her arms over her chest, and sighed as she took a step closer to him, “Doctor, please,” she begged him, stepping anxiously further in his direction, “Tell me, ‘cause sometimes you say things, and all I can do is wonder what they mean when I can’t sleep at night. Tell me, just this once.”

 

The time lord sighed, walking around the sofa until he closed the distance between them, then he reached his hand out for hers, not speaking until their fingers were laced together, “Just this once,” he promised her, then he closed his eyes as he took in a shaky breath, “Meeting Sarah Jane, seeing her again after all these years… It reminded me how short my time is with you. With any of you.”

 

She ran her thumb over the back of his hand, “But why’d you say  _ that _ , then?” she asked, a sorrowful tone taking over in the hushed voice she was speaking in, “We never talk about it, but it’s always there.”

 

“‘Cause for a moment back there, with that reminder that I’ll lose you one day, I let the walls break down,” he admitted, “And in that fresh grief, I told you things I shouldn’t have.”

 

“What the hell does that mean?”

 

He froze, the words he wanted to say next on the tip of his tongue, but the side of him that always yearned to run was currently battling him, and it was winning. But he needed to say something, she was owed an explanation, even if he could never let anything come of it, so despite the gob he usually had, he told her slowly, cautiously, calmly, what he meant outside that chippy earlier, “It means I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” he said, voice trembling slightly, so slightly he thought there was a chance she wouldn’t hear it, “It’s like I said, though, you can spend the rest of yours with me, but I can’t spend the rest of mine with you.”

 

Rose’s breath left her in a rush, “What?”

 

The Doctor was fairly certain he’d never been more scared as his mental walls crumbled to dust, “If I could, I’d spend the rest of my life with you,” he repeated, “But I have to live on when you’re…” he found himself unable to finish the sentence, “That’s the curse of the time lords. It means I’m going to have to watch the lines appear on your face and your hair grow grey while I’m still… I can’t ever grow old with you, and Rose…”

 

Her heart had never beat faster, “And what, Doctor?”

 

“I’ve never, I…” he laughed awkwardly, “Why is this so hard to say?”

 

“‘Cause you’ve never said it before,” Rose reminded him, though her voice was audibly trembling, making him question how much she could hear the shaking in his voice. 

 

“Quite right,” he replied, looking down at their entwined hands, “I should tell you… I want to grow old with you, Rose Tyler.”

 

There was a slight squeaking noise he was fairly certain had come from her mouth as she stared at him in shock. She wasn’t sure just what she’d been expecting from this conversation when she’d started it, but it hadn’t been that. She’d expected him to somehow manage to brush it off again. She’d expected to retreat into her bedroom and stare at the ceiling in silence, she hadn’t expected him to essentially admit to wanting her as a life partner. “I… I want to grow old with you, too,” she whispered, letting go of his hand as she wrapped her arms around him. 

 

He was quick to return the embrace, pulling her closer to him like he'd never let go, and if fate let him, he wouldn't. If it were up to him, he would never let go of Rose Tyler, he would stay with her forever, but the universe had a shitty sense of humor, and it tended to side against him. “Rose, I'm so sorry,” he said softly. 

 

“What for?”

 

“For never saying anything. I was just- selfish, if I'm being honest. Withholding my emotions so I didn't get hurt in the future, no regard for what you wanted… what… what do you want?” He asked, both hearts doing double time in his chest. 

 

She looked at him for a moment, and reached her hand up to caress his cheek, “Everything you just said,” she admitted, then she paused for a moment before she spoke again, “But what about the other thing you said tonight?”

 

“What was that, then?”

 

“‘Imagine watching that happen to someone who you…’”

 

The Doctor froze, suddenly remarkably nervous about finishing that sentence, “Does it need saying?”

She cocked her head to the side as she stared up at him, “Doctor,” she pleaded, heart heavy with the words he’d already said as she moved even closer to them, their bodies nearly touching at that point. 

 

He nodded, “Imagine watching that happen to someone who you love,” he finished.

 

“And I'm?”

 

“Someone,” the Doctor replied, his eyes dropping from hers, and unintentionally landing on her lips. It was this one, accidental look that set off a chain reaction. 

 

Rose noticed the look, and a small smile parted her lips as she leaned closer to him, slipping he hand on his cheek around to the base of his skull as she brought them together. 

 

The Doctor didn't protest as they came closer and closer together until her lips caressed his, and for the second time he understood what people meant when they saw fireworks. It was the same thing he'd seen on Satellite Five a few months ago when he'd saved her life, and now he knew that hadn't just been the time vortex filling his head. 

 

He let go of Rose’s hand, bringing it up to caress her face as their increasingly passionate kiss deepened, pulling her against him until their bodies were flush against each other, pouring all the things they didn’t know how to say into the kiss. At some point he felt Rose’s hands gripping his shoulders, more specifically the fabric of his trench coat, then a slight tug as she began to remove it. Without separating his lips from hers, he let go of her, and reached back to remove the coat, flinging it over the sofa he’d just been sitting on.

 

Rose’s hands reached up and grabbed the lapels of his jacket, tugging on them as she backed them up toward the sofa, the two separating as she gently pushed him onto it before she sat down beside them. Both were slightly breathless as they locked eyes once again, neither one sure of what to say. 

 

The Doctor was the first to acknowledge the silence as they simply stared at each other, “I can’t think of what to say,” he told her, a hint of a pant in his breathing, “I forgot how to begin…”

 

She shook her head, “We don’t have to say anything,” she reminded him, taking one of his hands in hers, and holding it in her lap, “We just… We’ve wasted enough time already.”

 

“Here goes, then.”

 

“Here goes.”

 

The words had only been out of her mouth for a second before she kissed him again, bringing their lips together a bit more quickly this time, a bit more desperately, like she needed it. He was more than willing to oblige, though a part of him was still undeniably nervous about kissing Rose Tyler, and that part revealed itself in the trembling hand that cupped the small of her back as he pulled her to him. 

 

As the minutes passed, nothing could be heard through the small flat except for the occasional shortened breaths of the time lord and his companion on the sofa. At some point, Rose had slung a leg over his, and was straddling his lap as they continued kissing, her hands reaching for the buttons on his suit jacket before she undid them one by one, and that, too was slung over the back of the sofa. 

 

“Rose?” he asked softly, staring up at her through hooded eyes.

 

“Yes, Doctor?”

 

“Are you absolutely certain your mum won’t be coming here tonight?”

 

Rose nodded, “Yeah, I’m sure,” she promised him, pressing another kiss to his lips.

 

The Doctor grinned into the kiss as he reached for the zipper of her jacket, pulling it down until it unlatched, and she pulled it off the rest of the way, letting it fall to the floor as she wrapped her arms around his shoulders, holding him tightly as they kissed like they were each other’s oxygen.

 

Rose reached a hand around for the Doctor’s tie, undoing the knot he’d done in the Tardis that morning, then that too fell on the sofa as she reached up, and ran her fingers through his hair, the kiss intensifying as the moments passed. 

 

At some point, he wound up on top of her, gently resting her head against the arm of the sofa as his lips caressed hers, saying all the words he was incapable of saying. Every emotion they both felt was poured into the kiss, into every brush of their hands over the other’s body, into Rose’s fingers on the buttons of his oxford as she began to push the buttons through one by one.

 

The two were so distracted in each other, they almost didn’t hear the sound of keys being inserted into a lock, neither one stopping until they heard the door open fully. When the Doctor heard it, he pulled away from Rose quicker than lightning, rolling himself off of her and the sofa until he was standing, unsure where to run from there. For whatever reason, Jackie Tyler was back, and the moment she saw them like this, she would instantly know what had happened. 

 

He didn’t fancy getting slapped twice. 

 

Mercifully, Rose was twice as fast a thinker as he was in this situation. She hurriedly stood to her feet, then she tugged on his hand as she led him into her bedroom, all but throwing him into the room as she rushed them away from the family room where she knew her mother would appear just seconds later. 

 

“Did we-?” the Doctor started, but he was interrupted by Rose’s pointer finger pressing itself to his lips. 

 

She quickly, but quietly shut the door behind them, then she looked up at the ceiling as though she were praying as Jackie Tyler entered the flat, chatting animatedly on her mobile. 

 

The Doctor’s hearts raced rapidly in his chest as Jackie reached their family room, his eyes scanning Rose’s for signs of the same fear as Jackie hung up her phone, and they heard the sound of it being tossed onto the sofa. The two waited quietly as they listened to Jackie walk into the room. Rose gestured for the Doctor to button up his Oxford, an order to which he quickly obliged, rushing up the row of buttons as they heard a gasp from Jackie. 

 

Both of them knew as soon as they heard it, she was seeing the clothes they'd strung over the couch. “Rose?” She called out softly, “Are you home, love?”

 

Rose looked up at the Doctor, “Do I look alright?” She whispered. 

 

In his eyes, she always looked perfect for a human, but he simply nodded, not spotting anything too disheveled about her appearance. The blonde grinned at him appreciatively, then she pressed a kiss to his cheek before she opened her bedroom door, and walked out to greet her mother with him following closely behind. 

 

“Oh, there you are,” Jackie breathed with a sigh of relief, looking up at her daughter in delight, “I didn't know you were coming in tonight. Mickey said you were in London, but…” her eyes landed on the clothes strung over the sofa, then she looked up at the couple, then at the sofa, then at the couple, repeating the process over and over as a flush of red spread on her features. 

 

It was in that moment the Doctor realized his chances of actually outliving Rose were incredibly slim. His chances of growing old with Rose, of waking up next to her one day wondering where the time went were phenomenally slim. 

 

“Jackie, I-”

 

“Mum, it’s not what you think,” Rose said, stepping between her mother and the time lord, “Something got on our clothes at the school, we were just about to put them in the wash.” She looked back at the Doctor for approval of the lie, to which he quickly nodded. 

 

Jackie looked between the two, still disbelieving of her daughter’s claims, “Alright, why are you doin’ it here, then? You’ve got that great, Martian spaceship to do it for you.”

 

“I’m not from Mars.”

 

“Mum, these creatures at work have the Tardis surrounded, we can’t get in there safely, so we came here.”

 

Jackie looked between them apprehensively for a moment, “Fine,” she muttered, setting down her purse on the sofa, “I’m going to bed. No funny business, you two. I don’t any Martians coming in my flat.” With that, she walked back down the hall to her bedroom, and a door closed behind her a moment later. 

 

As soon as Jackie was gone, the Doctor and Rose turned to face each other, their cheeks were both flushed pink from embarrassment, but as soon as they locked eyes they burst into laughter. “ _ Something got on our clothes _ ?” the Doctor repeated bewildered. 

 

Rose shushed him, though she laughed all the same as she led him back into her bedroom, “Don’t say that out there, she might hear you,” she warned him as she closed the door and locked it, “God, I feel like a teenager again.”

 

“How come?”

 

“Lying to her about a boy I brought home, well, in this case, time lord.”

 

The Doctor giggled, that soft, boyish giggle she secretly loved to hear, and she beamed up at him, “You know, we got interrupted back there…”

 

“Did we? Hadn’t noticed.”

 

“You arse.”

 

“You like it,” he teased, then his lips were on hers again, and their feet stumbled backwards until they collapsed on Rose’s bed, the layers between them growing smaller by the minute.. 

 

There was quite a bit of funny business that night, but fortunately for Jackie Tyler, it wasn’t the Martians that came.


End file.
